Dumbass Questions.

What is the wildest, craziest thing you ever wanted to do but didn't have the courage to follow through? ..

With regards to sex I have tried bdsm, bondage, asphyxiation, and some pretty kinky partners. .. lol .. and Now I know what really turns me on .. and its not any of these kinky things. .. yet in a way .. its all of these kinky things in moderation.

What goals in the arena of sex would you like to accomplish?

I have done many of the wild things people fantasize about. I have no desire to direct a porn movie .. but would love to write a high quality book that takes into account the things I have learned.


In your opinion, what would constitude really outstanding sex?

Great, I mean really really great sex, is about communication and love... communication on an extremely personal level. People who withhold the communication aspect of sex are never satisfied with the act.

You have to want him or her and she has to want you. I mean really hunger for each other. Your partner has to know this. Your job is to trust him/her enough to take the chance and let them know.

Sex should start days before contact with mind games (not mean ones but enticing ones) teasing and verbal insinuations. Some people are able to maintain this kind of sexual communication up constantly making physical contact when it comes .. electric.
This is where you learn how really exciting your partner is. This stage takes courage.

Foreplay is the center, not the build up to really good sex. It should be called Play .. not foreplay. ... Sex is a mind game and this mind game should continue with verbal play throughout. This takes courage.

Sex is about emotions. I can't see how emotionless copulation can be called sex. and btw sex is enhanced by emotions .. Sex immediately after funerals, weddings, etc. is better than usual. Sex when you're mad, or aggressive, or scared will seem better to you. I sometimes thing thats where sadists and masochists get their sexual highs from .. they artificially raise emotions of fear, anger or aggression or humiliation. Laying your emotions out there takes courage. .. lol

Sex is about physical excercise, friction and lubrication. But this is such a "of course" that we dont need to dwell on it. but really great sex is better when the two partys are fit. This doesn't take courage but takes preparation.

Sex is about teamwork and cooperation. Great sex is knowing how to dance with this specific partner.

and really great sex never happens the first time together .. sometimes the second .. but usually takes practice and willing participaction. do reruns. and fun reevaluations.. again .. takes courage.

Great sex is about gratitude and trust. Its about knowing your partner enjoyed it and wants more. Its your job to make sure this gets communicated well.

Great sex takes unselfish courage to take those emotional risks .


What are the qualities you can think of that an ideal woman or man would possess?
Kindness (I dont mean softness or tenderness).

Courage (try new things, step across taboo lines, let his/her partner lead to unknown places .. sometimes)
Confidence (willing to push his/her own comfort level. Concete and confidence are NOT the same thing.)
Joy (a sense of joy and laughter).
Adventure (and eagerness to explore).
Trusting and Trustworthy ( Each partner needs to feel safe, .. emotionally and physically)
Thrust (physically fit).
Beauty ( but remember every woman is beautiful to a man while he is plugged in. Women you would be amazed at how literally true this is)
Genuine, (Looks me in the eye).
Emotionally Expressive. (Still has his little boy in him or for her can squeal with happyness sometimes)
Takes no for an answer. (without the histrionics).
Needs me sometimes. (and guys .. this goes both ways)
Likes people (no raging introverts please)
Gets my humor. (can laugh and make jokes or see humor )
Is strong or gentle as needed (ladies this goes for you too).
Can both listen and talk without trying to change me (not overly judgemental).

Whips cut two ways

(Whips .. have you tried them? Sometimes they can be fun especially with dominance and submission games... Some people cant live without them. Me... I can take them or leave them. For me they are fun as dominance enhancing props. .. a bit more than window dressing for the mind... fantasy enhancing toys..Im not really into pain but can see its limited use .. occasionally. Pain for the sake pain turns me off. The following lets you imagine what I experienced (based on a true-life incident) where the home-made cat-o-nine tails had a very unexpected result.)

Imagine yourself ..naked (always works better if you imagine yourself naked doing this .. with clothes on its not the same!! grin) with sexy velvet and lace collar.. riding me.. taking me deep .. your hands on my chest..your fingers playing in the thin hair you find there .. your hips thrusting forward and back .. your back arched... head back.... breasts thrust out .. pulling your clit up and down on my washboard stomach.. my thick wet glistening cock sliding in and out as you push forward and back .. .. your knees splayed wide sliding in and out over the green satin sheets riding your stallion.. Just then I pull my whip out from under the pillow .. its a short home made cat-o-8 tails .. made from a hair brush handle and leather shoelaces...the whole thing including the handle is about 14 inches long. I take the little "cat" and drag the leather slowly over your breasts...letting you feel the little "cat's" tongues licking your super sensitive naked skin... you feel it on your skin with feelings of mixed excitement, fear, anticipation .. You think you know whats coming but you know its not allways as expected. after dragging the evil little tongues across your breasts and stomach a few times, I lay the cat over your shoulder.. letting you feel its weight... the 'tongues' (about 11 inches long ..8 of them) .. trail down our back between your shoulder blades .. I smile at you putting my hands on your hips and ramming you down making you take me more deeply. "Fuck me" I command in a very serious voice.. as you build closer and closer to orgasm I reach up and lift the handle from your shoulder.. and I slowly draw the cats tongues over your shoulder .. letting them trace down over your breast again ...you forget your building orgasm to let it build on its own without conscious thought while you feel the sensuous touch gently but ominously tracing over your naked skin.... then suddenly I flick my wrist so the fire breathing tongues go "swish" in the air and curls around your hip to leave sharp stinging steaks of fire across your ass cheek .. then my soft finger tips .. taking away the pain ..and you are surprised to find your orgasm was growing to an exciting volume as it picked up speed and force. You hear the "ssssssh" in the air as the tongues reach out again. And again .. except for one time... the stinging streaks of fire, surprise, and shock enhance the feeling of being dominated and taken.. finally it drives you over the edge into the deep chasm of an earth shattering orgasm. ...

I reach up and grip the back of your neck ..pulling you down on my chest while your muscles spasm and tremble uncontrollably in along lingering orgasm.. I hold you tight against my chest .. to come down from your exciting high.

You cant see me biting my lip in pain and swallowing quickly to prevent myself from heaving. I'm trying to overcome the pain from the one time I missed your ass and struck my tender balls. My balls are still on fire. but like any Alpha Male I bite my lip and take it.

Sometimes the whip finds the wrong target!

(This happened to me .. much like this ... and we rolled naked on the bed laughing at my pain. .. I can still remember the fire in my balls .. kinda made me soft for a while.)